Music & Cold To Relieve Teething

PIcture of Yogurita en Isla Verde

Similar to other things we embrace in life, parenting is an experience that we think is under control until we realize we are only on our first lap.

When our daughter Daniela started teething we found healthy and organic ways to help her by using natural products such as frozen carrots to help her ease the pain.

Daniela is two years old and the latest teething has her in pain at another level.

No longer does the frozen carrot work neither is she as easy to distract. Once she is focused on something its a lot more difficult to move her attention onto something else.

Music Tames the Pain

Daniela is passionate about music and dance so a few days ago while she was complaining about the teething pain I quickly activated my Bluetooth speaker in the living room with some of Daniela’s favorite songs that make her dance.

In seconds Daniela was dancing to El Sapo with a funk and bomba rhythm.

This gave us enough time to get a few bites of dinner while she forgot about the pain and uncomfortable teething sensation.

Being the parent of only one toddler helps Lucy and I, identify what she enjoys most and helps out greatly in situations where they are uncomfortable.

The same way that I like to entertain myself with Gwen Stefani, Fela Kuti, Andrea Bocelli, and Bob Marley, I am sure your kids will have something that can put them in a pleasant state of mind to deal with uncomfortable situations.

Frozen Drink numbs the Gum

After dinner we walked to a frozen yogurt place where they make fruit smoothies where our daughter enjoyed a cold treat which numbed her gums enough to relieve some of the pain.

With Music and a cold frozen drink we where able to keep our daughter’s focus on something else besides the teething.

What approach do you take to help a child or toddlers distract themselves when they are in pain or uncomfortable situations?

 

 

Setting Up Your Child’s Room for Success

Guest post from one of our friends and parent heroes “Candace Vorhaus”

Recently a teacher friend asked me about the best ways to set up her child’s room to enhance success in school.  I thought about my own children’s rooms and the important role their bedroom plays in their growth, development, success and happiness in school.  So, I asked her to consider four C3D Feng Shui aspects of her child’s room: the color, clutter, ch’i (life force energy), and design elements.

Color

The colors chosen for your child’s room can profoundly affect their IQ and intelligence according to a study by the State of California (http://www.excellence.dgs.ca.gov/MaxStPerformance/S4_4-2.htm).  Blacks, whites and grays can adversely affect a child’s IQ, making them feel dull, while a sunny yellow can stimulate and awaken the mind.  An overactive child will do well in a room with calming light blues and aqua’s while accents of bright reds and oranges can stimulate their minds and actually raise their IQ.  Chocolate brown colors will leave children feeling warm, cozy and loved.

Clutter

The constant clutter that plagues most children’s rooms can be distracting and block their forward progress.  Set up area’s in your child’s room where they can easily store their toys when they are finished playing.  Model how you want your children to keep their room by keeping your own room neat.  When things get really out of hand, make cleaning up and organizing a joint venture.  Kids tend to get overwhelmed quickly and give up when it comes to organizing their things.  Set a time each week for kids to clean their room.  For example say, “You need to pick up these toys before dinner.” Or, “Put away your clothes before you go to play on Saturday mornings.”

Ch’i

Keep the ch’i (life force energy) high in their rooms to keep them feeling uplifted and happy.  You can do this by bringing in a green plant or two.  Nature energy is very uplifting and the green plants will give off healthy oxygen.  Also, have fun, colorful art on their walls.  Avoid violent or scary images that can be found in posters of movies and video games.  That will really lower their ch’i and can make them feel angry or anxious.

Design your child’s room layout so their bed is in the commanding position.  That is, the bed is placed against the wall opposite the door, but not inline with the door.  Sleep is more peaceful because energetically they’re in command of their space.  If the bed can’t be moved, another option is strategically placing a mirror so your child can see the door opening from their bed.

Most importantly, create a world for your child that is different from the rest of the house, where children can go to lose themselves in study, constructive play, or contemplation.

For more C3D Feng Shui information and a complimentary Feng Shui Ba Gua, head over to Candace’s website: candacevorhaus.com

More on Candance

Candace Vorhaus is a leading Feng Shui expert, spiritual coach, and classically trained interior designer.  Candace is the founder of C3D Feng Shui, which compassionately incorporates Color, Clutter management, Ch’i (life force energy), and Design into every project, both domestically and abroad.  Candace believes focusing on the C3D of your personal space is the missing link to lifelong fulfillment and achieving your highest potential. 

            With over 20 years of design and Feng Shui experience, along with direct teachings from the founder and leader of BTB Feng Shui, the late Feng Shui Grandmaster Professor Thomas Lin Yun, Candace is a professional colorist and widely recognized as a leading Feng Shui authority in the West.

            Candace grew up in Garden City, New York, and after receiving her BA in English Literature from Gettysburg College; she received an A.S. in Interior Design from the Parson’s School of Design, in New York City.  Candace also trained extensively at the Musée des Arts Décoratif at the Louvre in Paris, France.

             Upon completing her interior design studies, Candace trained under celebrated interior designer, Juan Montoya, before launching her own successful interior design business, Candace Connors Interior Design, where she was featured in Better Homes and Gardens, among other publications.

Candace also spent an intensive seven years of spiritual training and transformation under the private tutelage of world-renowned spiritual coach and mystic, Glorynn Ross, and Barbara Brennan School of Healing practitioner, Irene Rebecca Bodendorf.

A member of the International Association of Women in Business Coaching, Candace is married to Robbie Vorhaus, a communications strategist, and lives in Sag Harbor, New York, with their two children, and very cute dog, Ollie.  

Enjoying Pictures

I am always looking for things to do with Daniela. As a parent and small business owner making time for my daughter is a priority.  It is also a challenge because I always want to spend even more time with her.

These past few weeks Lucy (my other half) takes our dog Juanga for a walk in the morning. Our daughter wakes up searching for mom wanting to be breastfed. If mom is not near, she will start crying and it is my job to get her focused on something else.

Getting her Busy

I usually offer her water and ask a few other routine questions. If I see she does not want anything I offer, then I try to get her entertained on something else.

Recently I moved some family pictures to sync with my new iPhone 5. When my daughter could not stop crying, I had my phone and decided to show our daughter some of the pictures we took on our last vacation before she was born.

When I started showing her the pictures, those of mom and dad captivated her attention, especially the ones when she was in mom’s belly. When I think of that picture it is part of capturing her story.

Pop Quiz on her Progress

While watching the pictures I was able to catch the good memory she has when it comes to identifying objects, characters (Disney), and family members.

I was able to capture how she is mixing words and understanding nouns and verbs.

Since I have not been near any other toddlers, I can’t compare my daughter’s milestones to others (I don’t think I would anyway). Everyday I am impressed by how much she is learning.

Next time she is a bit un-relaxed, I think I will repeat the exercise to show her old pictures and make it an opportunity for her to know a bit of what happened in the past via images.

My only wish is that someday she will be doing the same with my grandkids.

Ignacio’s Science Rock Concert from a Kid’s Perspective

One of the great thing of using social platforms as Facebook, Twitter, and Google + is that you can connect with individuals that might have the same interests as you.

As I shared pictures of Ignacio Peña’s El Gran Debate del Planeta Tierra and commented on the great time and experience my Facebook Friend Wanda Tirado contacted me that her daughter had been in the same event.

Wanda Tirado mentioned that her kid could not stop talking about her experience of being present at what I call Ignacio’s Science School of Rock.

I took the liberty to ask Wanda if her daughter Andrea could answer a few questions on the experience. Wanda and her daughter Andrea quickly agreed and the next day I did my first interview with Wanda as my correspondent.

Here are some of the replies of what 9th grade student Andrea Nicole Berrios Tirado from the school Ernesto Ramos Antonini Escuela Libre De Musica experienced.

Interview – Andrea Nicole

Interview done by Raúl [RC] via Facebook with the help and permission of Andrea’s [ANB] mom Wanda Tirado.

[RC] Had you ever listened to Ignacio Peña before going to the Event?

[ANB] No, I had never listened to Ignacio Peña before.

[RC] What music do you usually listen too?

[ANB] I normally listen to Rap, Hip Hop, Pop, and Techno.

[RC] What part of the event did you like the most?

[ANB] I liked when the first song started and when I was reading the visuals that where coming out of the three screens during the concert.

[RC] Was there a scientist that captured your attention during the visual presentation?

[ANB] I was very interested by a scientist in a wheelchair that spoke via a computer…I don’t know his name. (Stephen Hawking)

[RC] Was there a scientific fact that you found interesting?

[ANB] How the world would end if we continue to contaminate it and also what happens in the atmosphere. That impacted me greatly.

I really enjoyed the fact that Andrea Nicole and I, although of very different ages, where actually seeing things from the same perspective. Another pat on the back to Ignacio’s team because it is always difficult to create the same impressions on different people; even more difficult when they are from different age groups.

We experienced how Ignacio was immersing kids into his style of music while captivating them with great information and knowledge of what is happening with our mother earth.

I am glad that Facebook gave me the opportunity to see “El Gran Debate del Planeta Tierra” from the lens of a 9th grade student.

Thanks Andrea and Wanda

Special thanks to Wanda for being a Super mom and super daughter Andrea for rising to the occasion so I could get her perspective.

How are your Kids learning? Are they immersed in Science?

What types of Music are they listening too?

I think taking your children to an event like Ignacio’s is a unique experience where they will learn and never forget.

Capturing Your Child’s Story in Images

As I organize and review my daily tasks, there is one that is a critical to-do item and that is to take a picture of my daughter and send it to my closest family members.

This daily task has helped me capture pictures of my daughter and document her growth the past 20 months.

Our brain tends to ignore small changes in those we see very day. If you are a parent, there is no better feeling of seeing your children grow healthy. Trying to document every detail just using your memory is an impossible task.

I have saved a huge collection of images of my daughter. Once in a while I go back and I check on the images and realize how in such little time she has grown so much.

She now talks and exchanges words with me. I tend to forget how months ago she was such a tiny human being crying for food. She has evolved into a toddler full of energy who will ask for food and water. Her evolution from infant to toddler has been amazing to watch.

Capturing those moments will help serve as a legacy of sharing my daughter’s story.

If you are a new parent, I highly recommend you start taking a picture a day of your child and storing them so in the future you can see the beauty of how mother nature takes us from one stage to another.

Are you up for the one photo a day challenge?

Toddler Tantrums

There comes a time in every parents life where they have to deal with tantrums. Once you are a parent you understand a bit better on how sometimes getting control of a situation seems to be easier said than done.

The only valuable advice I can provide other parents is to keep calm. Similar to other situations in life, keeping calm will help you deal with a toddler tantrum a lot better.

Most of my daughter’s tantrums are triggered by the fact that her geeky parents (especially me) want to immerse her in technology. She has been playing with an iPad since she was three months old.

We would be able to take away any item (or gadget) and our daughter would move on and go to the next thing.

Lately she has been throwing small tantrums when she wants something and does not get it immediately. I did some research in trying to find a solution and I found two articles which where very helpful. Our common sense has been to remove her from the situation that caused the tantrum as quickly as possible; we also confirmed this is a good approach.

Before removing your child from the situation it is critical to identify if the child is:

  • Hungry
  • Tired
  • Over-Stimulated
  • Frustrated
  • Pleas for Attention

Dr. Sears recommends keeping a tantrum journal to see what sets him off. Maybe an application like Evernote on your phone can facilitate making note of these.  (Reference – http://www.parenting.com/article/ask-dr-sears-intolerable-toddler-tantrums)

Independence vs dependence.

In my case, my daughter’s can-do attitude only worsens the situation when I try doing stuff for her. She reminds me that I am there to help her. That way she learns how to do it and it becomes beneficial to all parties.

“Ayuda”

One of the first words we have been helping my daughter understand is “Ayuda” (which means help in Spanish). This might be a way to defuse the situation and allow her to ask for help before she becomes frustrated.

Tag Your Teammate

I remember when I watched the WWF (now WWE) when I was a kid. My favorite events were when it was tag team wrestling. When a wrestler got tired or into trouble, he would tag his partner who usually was in a better state to take care of business. On some occasions you might need the help of those who are around you. If you are a single parent, I tip my hat off to you. For single parents maybe a family member or close friend can come in an assist.

As other professionals mentioned in the sources we share below, they emphasize that tantrums are a completely normal part of the Toddler’s development.

Any tips on how you deal with your Toddler Tantrums?

Would love to continue sharing ideas in the comments area!

External Sources

 

 

Different Dads, Same Life Lessons


Photo by McCluckles

This is a Guest Post by Brandi and Brandon Duncan for our Father’s Day Memories Series 2012.

Brandi and I grew up in much different households with often-differing values and traditions. But, regardless of these differences, we also had several similarities. With Father’s Day approaching, we decided to write this from the perspective of the similar things we learned from our dads. Here are the top five things that two very different people taught us: (in no particular order)

Work Ethic

Both of our dads are hard workers. Brandi’s dad has always been more of a hands-on type of person working in maintenance, oil rigs, and construction type jobs. Mine was military for 30 years, then moved on to technology and communications based jobs. Regardless of the field,  both have unsurpassed work ethic, and they both taught us that you work for what you want and don’t take handouts.

A friend in need…

Both of our dads would give you the shirt off their back if you needed it. This is certainly a dying quality in people these days. The funniest thing about them both, though, is while they would do anything for you; it may not have always been the things you thought you needed at that time. Both seemed to have an uncanny knack for knowing what was better for you in the long term rather than the short. It made us both appreciate the “Teach a man to fish…” adage.

Be open-minded and never judge

This is certainly a lesson that we all need to continue to pass down. Neither of our dads judged people at face value. Bigotry had no place, though both of them came from a time when it was a common practice. Our kids face a much more diverse society than even we did growing up, but we continue to reinforce that a person is a person regardless of their sexual preference, color, religion, or where they live.

Treat others…

Manners will get you everywhere. Granted, where Brandi’s dad is from, “yes, sir/ma’am” is expected (and enforced, even in schools) and that was not the case in my home, both of our dads insisted on showing respect to others and you treat people how they should be and how you would want to be treated yourself. Surprisingly enough both of them used the phrase “always be invited back”—something we both still use today. Our kids know that they are to act not only right, but also in such a way that the other parent would not hesitate to have them over again.

Don’t sweat the small stuff

One of the most endearing qualities in both of our dads is that neither takes their self very serious. Both have the mentality that you work hard and you make the time to play hard. Beyond making it a rule that you enjoy your life, they both agreed that you can’t let the little things in life get to you. After all, if you stress about the little things, what are you going to do when faced with something big? More than that, they both taught us that some things you just can’t avoid, so find a way to fix it rather than focusing on how bad it is at the moment. (I believe mine once uttered that “a bill never killed anyone”—very true.)

There you have it—two very different dads who instilled very similar values into their kids. Brandi and I are thankful for these lessons and are adamant about passing them to our kids. And, both of us will admit that it sure is nice to hear how well-behaved and good our kids have been when they return from somewhere. We must be doing something right.

In closing, Brandi and I want to thank Raul, Lucy, and the rest of the Papa Heroes team for the opportunity to guest post on their wonderful blog. We look forward to watching it continue to grow and continue to be a great resource for parents in the fight for online safety and good parenting for our kids.

Thanks to Team Duncan for submitting this post. You can find Brandi (@DuncanBrandi) and Brandon (@BrandonPDuncan) here:

Photo  by  McCluckles


Why Parents Need 2 Monitors

I can write a very long list on the many advantages of having two monitors or more can boost productivity. As a stay at home dad I wanted to share tips I use to accomplish quick and easy tasks.

I use one monitor for doing my primary tasks. Instead of printing out documents, I usually review them on one monitor and make any annotations on the other.

Increasing Productivity

Recently I realized that having two monitors is something that helps me when my 17-month-old daughter needs to be entertained for a short period of time while I still need to get work done.

I put my daughter on my lap and open a new browser window where she can watch her favorite youtube personality and my friend @PayasaAgapita.

To prove how effective this can be, I wrote this post while my daughter sat on my lap and watched her videos.

Give having one or more monitors a try. It might help you read or write a blog post or get a few emails out of the way. This is  helpful on those days that your toddler or children needs more attention than usual.

Take a look at one of Payasa Agapita’s Videos. Her videos are great if you or your children are learning Spanish!

Payasa Agapita Video

Over-Protecting Children

Birdhouse by Raul J Colon

 

This is a guest post by Debbie Pribele, BA ECE

Where is that line that you cross between protecting and overprotecting your child? As with most things, there is no black and white “line” but a fluctuating “grey area”

What is that grey area?

On the one side we have safety. For the most part, that is pretty clear – keep your children safe from severe falls, cuts, burns, bites, and the list goes on.

On the other side we have life, filled with challenges and skill building.

What do I mean by that? We learn through experiences, whether that is first hand or by watching others or by being told. Our self-esteem is developed through our achievements, whether is it end-result successes or just knowing that we tried and that we did our best.

Resiliency comes from being confronted with challenges and finding strategies to overcome them, work around them, or cope with them and move on.

All of these skills (and more) come from having challenges in our lives. The grey area is that mush in the middle where we, as adults, often don’t know whether we should step in and protect our children or stand back and let them muddle through a situation on their own and develop the skills mentioned above.

Entering the Grey Areas

When we enter into that grey area and protect our children, although we are keeping them safe, we may also be robbing them of the opportunity to develop their knowledge base, to enhance their self-esteem and problem-solving skills, and/or strengthen their resiliency abilities. And if we intervene too often (and out of the grey area and right into the area of “life”) we might also be heading them into the realm of “life is all about me” and “one solution problem-solving”.

I was first awakened to this by a parent of a two year old. The little girl had fallen off a riding toy and her legs were all tangled up in the toy. I went to help her out and her mother intervened and said, “She is all right. She will figure it out.” And she did. A little twist this way, a little twist that way, another twist, pull, and shove, and up she got, back on the toy and off she went.

Importance of Creative Thinking

Just think about all the creative thinking she had to do in order to get out of the predicament she was in. If I had stepped in and rescued her, it would have been me who was doing all the thinking as I inadvertently encouraged her to be dependent on me to solve her problems.

Then, how do we, as parents and educators, know when we are in that grey area and how do we know which way we should lean: safety or opportunity?

First of all, using the wise words from “Funniest Home Videos“: “put down the camera” – if it is an obvious safety issue, or if in doubt, protect the child! No second thoughts, no after thoughts or guilt feelings. Keep those young ones (and older ones) safe!

If there is no urgent need to intervene then take a moment to think about the situation.

  • What is your intention and what is the child’s?
  • Why do you want to intervene?
  • What might happen if you do and what might happen if you don’t?
  • What is the child trying to do?
  • How can you help him/her learn how to be successful at the task?
  • How can you help him/her decide when to seek help and when to not try this on their own?

Is the child capable of overcoming the challenge?

  • Could he/she be successful if given a little time to think about it, a little encouragement, guidance, and/or a little practice?
  • Is this a good time to let them spread their wings a little bit and see how they manage, with perhaps a little assistance from you?
  • Speaking of capable, is it developmentally appropriate for your child?
  • Does your child have the physical, intellectual, emotional and/or social skills to manage in the situation?

Knowing your Child

Knowing your child, at what point is the expectation too much?

Here is another grey area – that line between being able to be successful at overcoming a challenge and, thus, enhancing their self-esteem and the situation being too frustrating for them resulting in a melt-down and negative affects on self-esteem.

Parentings Grey Areas

Parenting is filled with grey area situations and unknowns. As I like to say, we are an expert on our children as babies when they make it into toddlerhood and we are an expert on our children as toddlers when they reach preschool age… and so on and so on.

Hindsight is 20/20 but we don’t live in hindsight. All we have is this moment and all we can do right now is do the best that we can.

We give “a little twist this way, a little twist that way, another twist, pull, and shove” and next thing you know the children are all grown up and moving out of the house.  And during the process we (hopefully) become a bit wiser, we enhance our self-esteem and problem-solving skills, and we strengthen our resiliency abilities, just like our children do when they are met with challenges!

Are you over-protective?

  • Are there times when you could step back and empower your child?
  • What skills would you like to see your child develop?
  • What “golden opportunities” can you let unfold while you stand back with baited breath, ready to jump in when needed?
  • Just another something to think about. Oh the joys of parenting!

We thank Debbie for sharing her thoughts with us. You can find her on the web: 

Home: Website
Google Plus: “Early Childhood” Page
Community ManagerLumberJocks.comGardenTenders.comHomeRefurbers.com

 


I got it Dad

Every parent’s main goal is to help his or her children on the road to being independent. My daughter is 16 months old and I get amazed on how fast she grows and how much she is learning.

Observing her especially in my first hour every morning leads me to see how she wants to try things on her own. She started requesting to feed herself months ago, now she brushes her teeth (toothbrush & water), and lately the list of things she wants to do on her own is endless.

The Main Goal

This past march when I went to SXSWi I had the opportunity to meet Aaron Manley from @motorphilia. I first heard of Aaron when @chrisbrogan wrote “Buy a Car Off The Internet”. Since then I have been reading the awesome content and stories Aaron shares online. I had the opportunity to spend an hour with Aaron and it was an enlightening experience on how Aaron sees life.  Aaron is an extremely positive guy and since I met him I have been working on seeing the positive side of many aspects in my life.

Key Take Away

Talking with Aaron there was one specific lesson that I took away from the conversation. I remember Aaron mentioned that his goal in life is to be able to see and make his kid become independent. In his words he feels he did his job when his son is ready for the many challenges in life.

Early Signs of Independence

As my daughter continues to learn and become more independent I see that little by little she is telling me to back off. There are moments where she is telling me in her own way Dad I got this. I recently experienced it with an iPad app she enjoys which is called Wood Puzzle. Thanks to Mommy Beta’s review and a recommendation from the folks of Daddy On Board it is the IOS app that I have gotten the most parenting value from yet.

The objective of the Wood Puzzle First Years for iPad is to place shapes into corresponding slots. My daughter does a good job with placing many of the items with a few other I give her a hand. On most occasions when I try to help her she brushes my hands of the screen and continues the attempts.

Babies and children have a unique way to focus on something and accomplish the task at hand; so stopping them might not be the best idea.

In my case I will continue to motivate Daniela in trying her best at the iPad app which will hopefully lead to other things in the future when Daniela says “Dad don’t worry I got this”.